When I was young, I loved my mother so much. But she had untreated mental illness, and I experienced a lot of neglect, distance, and criticism. When I was six, my school reported her to social services. I always tried to get her approval, my whole life. I was able to forgive her, and after I became a mother, we became good friends. She loved our son and was a wonderful grandmother. She died eight months ago after a rare, terrible illness. Many, many friends from my congregation came to her funeral, which was jam packed. I was really touched. My mother was a Protestant but not a Lutheran. Since then, my church friends have all but “disappeared.” I think they are avoiding me because they know that my mother meant so much to me, and they don’t know what to say. Our pastor recently accepted a call elsewhere, or I would have paid him a visit. I’ve returned to choir and although people have been friendly, not one of them has ever asked me how I am doing. I have been a member of this LCMS congregation for about 25 years and suddenly feel invisible. I’m really struggling and if it weren’t for God, I would be alone. I don’t expect anybody to fix my grief, of course. I would have just liked to have felt like I still mattered and belonged. I find myself thinking of leaving and attending my mother’s former church, but I am a Lutheran. I have since learned that it is not uncommon for friends to “disappear” after you lose someone. It’s a double loss in a sense, but all it takes is a simple “I’m praying for you” or “How are you doing?” To communicate that you care. I never imagined that I would be so devastated after my mom died and never expected to feel so abandoned, unloved, and forgotten, like I no longer belong. Anyway, if you are currently dealing with grief, I’m praying for you. I also know that Jesus is with me and will never abandon me. Thank you for allowing my comment.