Children Stay in the Faith When Both Parents Teach Them

After reviewing what was said at their Baptisms, LCMS confirmands affirm their intention “to continue steadfast in this confession and Church and to suffer all, even death, rather than fall away from it” (LSB p. 273). Nevertheless, confirmation is often the last time we see some of these young people in church. When they become adults, some children return, but many do not.

How do we keep young people in the church after they grow up and are on their own? This has become an urgent question, not only for congregations and denominations, but for parents who worry about their children’s spiritual lives.

Some research is confirming what many pastors have long observed: When both parents take their children to church and are active in teaching their children about the Christian faith, their children tend to hold onto that faith when they grow up.

Finnish scholars did a 10-year follow-up study on a set of young people who were confirmed — when they were 14 or 15 years old — in the Evangelical Lutheran Church of Finland, to find out what they said about their faith now.

“In roughly half of the young people studied, their faith remained fairly stable from the age of 15 to the age of 25,” reported one of the researchers. “However, one in three became more distant from faith, both according to their own assessment and a longitudinal analysis. One in seven felt they had become closer to God or that their faith had become stronger.”

Parental involvement makes the difference. “Children who receive a religious upbringing from both parents have stronger faith throughout adolescence and are less likely to move away from religion as they grow up,” according to a journalist’s account of the research. “In summation, the study’s authors concluded that children receiving religious instruction from both mom and dad are flat out different, from a religious perspective, than their peers.”

What about children who get religious input from just one parent? Overall, according to the study, they tend to be closer to the pattern of those who grow up without any parental involvement.

But the researchers hasten to cite the exceptions. “Young people who have not been given a religious upbringing at home aren’t necessarily destined to become distant or estranged from faith: other factors outside the home environment can contribute to the growth of their faith,” said researcher Kati Tervo-Niemelä.

The study found other important influences: grandparents, the personal context of their confirmation, education environments, and pastors and other parish workers. The research team concluded, “Overall, the findings strongly indicate that a young person’s faith isn’t born and doesn’t grow in a vacuum: it needs supporting experiences and people who give an example of what it is like to have faith. The influence of just one person can be course-altering.”

Of course, this is a study of Finland. It would be good to see similar research studying 14- to 25-year-old Americans. Finland, though culturally Lutheran, has become highly secularized. While Finland has significant outposts of strong Christian faith, churchgoing is no longer the norm.

So, despite all of the obstacles in a secularist society, a mother and a father can still effectively pass on their faith to their children. This research confirms what the Bible says: “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it” (Prov. 22:6).

3 thoughts on “Children Stay in the Faith When Both Parents Teach Them”

  1. So, why aren’t pastors being equipped at seminary & in continuing ed how to equip & encourage couples the importance of & how to catechize their children at home? For too long, the church has thoughtlessly followed the culture in separating children from their parents for Christian education. It’s time the Church wakes up & starts equipping & encouraging parents to catechize the biblical & historical way! We learned how because God graciously brought us back to the beauty of Luther’s Small Catechism. It is so useful for our smallest to have memorized like they have our native language memorized so they are able to discern & engage in effective spiritual warfare that is constantly attacking them! The CVD crisis brought the need for apologetics/polemic training into broad daylight. It’s evidenced in the homeschool movement more than doubling (from 5%-11%) in the last two years that parents are waking up! Will the Church be able to step up & guide them, or will we miss that boat like we missed the boat of rejecting the overpopulation agenda, the BCPill and contraceptives?! If we say we believe in promoting God’s created order, we need to repent, and get busy straightening out the mess we’ve allowed to happen in the LCMS! Just a mother wanting to be the mother Jesus wants me to be!

  2. John Joseph Flanagan

    Interesting article. Many good points were raised. Family matters a whole lot in the spiritual and emotional growth of children. Where there is stability, and where both parents and the church raise children with a knowledge of the Gospel and the importance of faith in Christ, there is no better biblical approach than this to nourish and equip young Christians for life in this fallen world. We can never predict whether the roots of their faith will grow or decay, but the effort must be made. I knew a pastor who raised his two sons as well as he could, and they grew up in the church family he pastored.. One of his sons went off to college, earned advanced degrees, and announced he was an agnostic, rejecting his faith entirely. The pastor was very troubled by this unexpected turn of events. This is a reason why we must never take for granted that a Christian education alone is enough. Parents must always pray that the Holy Spirit will bring their children through trials or influences leading to unbelief. Spiritual warfare is the place where souls are saved or lost.

  3. I agree totally! both my parents who are now dead! taught me and brother how to believe in Jesus Christ and In God and how to stand on the faith.. It wasnt easy for all 4 of us, but we made it through the hard times and well as the easy times… Both parents were married in the Lcms and were confirmed in the faith and we;my brother And I grew up in the church from the time we were christened at birth til the time we were confirmed… and my Grand
    parents as well… Just about every sunday I was in church with my grandma,sometimes with my grandpa. We were a Strong Lutheran Family growing up…

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