By Kate Deddens
The German theologian Dietrich Bonhoeffer once wrote, “The home is a realm of its own, a fortress amid the storms of time, a refuge, indeed, a sanctuary. … It rests in God … [who] has given it its own meaning and value, its own nature and right, its own purpose and dignity.”[1] It is through these God-given qualities that the Christian home becomes the nucleus of faith cultivation and vocational instruction for our children; furthermore, through these God-given qualities, the Christian home can proclaim the Gospel and serve its neighbors. Martin Luther emphasized this in various writings and sermons, teaching that “By natural and divine right, authority is lodged in the parents. … It is their function to instruct, to train, and to govern”[2] their children.
Home life, the bedrock of instruction
In his book, Habits of the Household, Justin Earley writes, “One of the most significant things about any household is what is considered to be normal. … Our routines become who we are, become the story and culture of our families.”[3] It is through such rhythms — liturgies, if you will — of our homes that we may generously and gently disciple our children.
In our Lutheran households, the “story and culture” of families centers upon raising our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord through the fostering of faith and by preparing our children for their Christian vocation: to love and serve their communities.
In Habits for a Sacred Home, Jennifer Pepito describes rhythms which can be cultivated in the home to support these goals. Through encouragement of intentional habits of work, stewardship, prayer, order, simplicity, stability, hospitality, community and balance, Christian families can be “island[s] of virtue, a refuge for culture and hope,” “sacred homes for the service of the Lord,” and “light in a dark world.”[4]
In Pepito’s writing, she echoes Luther, who expressed his belief that “Children are … a precious gift of God. Domestic government is to be administered in wisdom and love. … The instruction of children … should begin with religion as the most important of all subjects … and the whole life be directed to a fulfillment of the divine commandments in all their relations. The parents should in all things set an example of upright living. … Thus trained, [children] go forth into life to become honored and useful members of society.”[5]
Bringing up citizens and servants of God
Out of each individual household come the children who will grow into men and women who fill the church and the state and will then begin families and establish households of their own. Among Luther’s three estates, he placed the Christian household as foundational to the others. He wrote, “The family occupies a fundamental relation to both civil and divine government, since it has the training of the future citizen and servant of God.”[6] He wrote that “if we wish to have proper and excellent persons both for civil and ecclesiastical government, we must spare no diligence, time, or cost in teaching and educating our children, that they may serve God and the world.”[7]
The practice of such liturgies of the home can be challenging; it does require intentionality and effort. Rebekah Curtis and Rose Adle write in their book, LadyLike: Living Biblically, that “the virtues of commitment and perseverance … are two of the main things required for keeping a household running day after boring day, week after madcap week, year after vanishing year.”[8] Such habits and rhythms must be introduced, practiced and instilled with patience, diligence and even a degree of creativity as parents integrate biblical principles of living into homes filled with uniquely created individuals.
An art form needs work
“A family is an art form … [and] an art form needs work.”[9] Gene Veith and Mary Moerbe express it this way in their book, Family Vocation: “Family is not a human construct; rather it is a … gift … As such, God is the one who calls human beings into families.”[10] And for Bonhoeffer, the home, which is the epicenter of families, “is established by God in the world … as a place of peace, quietness, joy, love, purity, discipline, reverence, obedience, tradition, and, in all of these, happiness.”[11]
As parents and stewards of the future generations, it is our vocation to establish households which incarnate such a vision of the home as a faith-nurturing, life-giving haven, a sacred shelter, a confession of Christ and a source of service.
[1] Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison: Dietrich Bonhoeffer Works, Vol. 8, ed. John de Gruchy (Minneapolis: Fortress Press, 2010), 85.
[2] F.V.N. Painter, Luther on Education (Philadelphia: Lutheran Publication Society, 1889), 127.
[3] Justin Whitmel Earley, Habits of the Household (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2021), 4–5.
[4] Jennifer Pepito, Habits for a Sacred Home (Minneapolis: Bethany House Publishers, 2024), 17.
[5] Painter, Luther on Education, 127.
[6] Painter, Luther on Education, 127.
[7] Painter, Luther on Education, 117.
[8] Rebekah Curtis and Rose Adle, LadyLike: Living Biblically (St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 2015), 118.
[9] Edith Schaeffer, What is a Family? (Grand Rapids: Baker Book House Company, 1975), 17.
[10] Gene Edward Veith Jr. and Mary J. Moerbe, Family Vocation: God’s Calling in Marriage, Parenting, and Childhood (Wheaton: Crossway, 2012), 219.
[11] Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison, 85.
Cover image: “House among trees; Pont-Aven,” Emile Bernard, 1888.
